A silent confession (1136 words)

As Naresh took the car slowly out of the gate of his complex, a small boy waved his hand to stop the vehicle.​ Naresh lowered the window glass and looked at the ten-year-old boy dressed in tattered clothes. The boy came closer and spoke softly​,”​ Ma wants you to talk to her today.”

Naresh, with a ​​tinge of impatience in his voice, hurriedly replied, “OK, I will do,” and drove the car towards the mall

Nirmala, his wife, sitting by his side, ​p​lied him with a spate of questions “Who is that boy? He seems from a poor background. Why does he want you to talk to his Ma? Do you know her?”

“Yes, they are known to my family​ even before our marriage. Possibly she needs some help. Let me find out​,” replied Naresh in a subdued tone.

She was not ​​convinced but kept silent. The evening lost its charm for her. Even when she reached home, the question of who she could be kept troubling her mind. The next day when Naresh was away, she happened to see his passbook​ lying on his table by chance and was intrigued to notice that he had drawn in the first week of each month without fail Rs. 5000.. Her mind was riddled with all sorts of doubts and imaginary fears.

After dinner ​w​hile watching TV, she casually asked him concealing her unease, “Did you meet the woman, the boy’s mom?”

Startled, Naresh turned towards her and nodded his head in the affirmative.

“Don’t you feel the need to take me into confidence on these secretive meetings?” she asked. I see you draw some money from your bank each month. I don’t know what for,” she asked sharply.

​With some weariness at her suspicious tone, he sighed and said,​ “I understand your concern. The monthly withdrawals are towards meeting a liability. Any amount of my explanation will not satisfy you easily. I will take you to her house ​tomorrow when ​you will understand things better. Till such time, let us not discuss this.” Naresh replied.

“Why should I meet this woman and humiliate myself further? Either you make a clean breast of all your surreptitious dealings​ now or be prepared to lose me,” she exploded.

“Don’t talk crap and indulge in unfair insinuations. I am not willing to talk any further. If you wish to know more, you can come with me tomorrow” he said with finality and left for the bedroom

She stayed behind seething in anger and did not follow him.​ She fell asleep after a long time on the sofa.

​A​s they walked down​ the next day, the dimly lit narrow lane with cheap tenements on both sides​, she saw with revulsion the lane was dirty with garbage littered all around, children defecating in the open and dogs running around. The boy saw them and ran to his house to alert his mom. When they entered, a woman in her forties greeted them with a namaste and said with warmth," Welcome, Chota bhai(Young brother), we are honoured by your visit along with your wife.”

She gave a big smile to Nirmala and said “Welcome. I have no proper chairs to offer. Please sit on this stool. I am so happy to see you. You are very beautiful and make an ideal match ​​for my bhai (younger brother).” ​Meanwhile, one little girl of around twelve brought cool water in stainless steel tumblers. The boy was standing at the door watching her with interest.

Nirmala turned around to see an old woman lying very sick on the floor with her legs folded​ and drawn together. The house showed signs of poverty everywhere except in the smiles of the woman and her children.

​As the woman went to the kitchen to prepare chai, Naresh broke the silence and said​ almost in a whisper,  ​ "Nirmala,​this lady is like my elder sister.​ She was happily living with her husband and children till one day I shattered their lives by my reckless act.​ Her husband who was on his way home​ after work was killed on the spot when my car hit him.​ It was no fault of his​ but fully mine. I decided then that I would adopt this lady as my elder sister and help her bring up her family.​ It was a penance for me​ and a duty​ that I owed her and her children.​ The monthly withdrawals you noticed are the payments made to her. She called me yesterday seeking advice ​on whether to admit her ​mother-in-law to a hospital.​ I arranged ​for a doctor to see her and she is better now.”

Nirmala looked at him with some confusion still writ on her face.”​ You could have explained all this to me instead of keeping me in the dark about what seems a laudable work.​ Why the secrecy,​ I don’t follow?​Do you think I would have stood in the way?” she ​asked

“I will explain on our way back.​ Let us talk to them meanwhile​,”​ he replied

After spending some time with them exchanging pleasantries they left for home.

“Nirmala,​ I should have told you on my own.​ I was shy of admitting to a grievous wrong done by me lest you think ​poorly of me.​ It was before our marriage.​ I was returning from a ​​late-night party.​ This man was cycling after his shift​ at the edge​ away from the road.​ I was careless and talking on my mobile till the accident occurred.​ My dad being a senior police official ensured that I was not held responsible.​ But my mind was restless when I came to know about his wife,​ two young children and his aged mom.​ It was a conscious decision that I took​ to help them, “he ​explained

“What is there to be shy of? I am actually proud of you​,”​ she ​​replied.

“No,​ I must confess that when I drove the car​, I was fully drunk and unfit to drive.​ I stopped drinking from that night.​ It was this fact that deterred me from taking you into confidence.​ The weight of ​the burden on my heart has today been lifted.​ ”

As he stopped the car in ​​front of his gate,​ she moved closer to him and hugged him tightly with pride in her eyes​​. She added, "The amount you give is hardly adequate. I will chip in on my part an ad-hoc amount for basic needs like a cot, chairs, beds and a gas stove and bear fully the expenses for the education of the two kids till their graduation."

Naresh, his heart lighter than it had been in years, returned her embrace aware he was finally free of the guilt that had haunted him for so long​ and also happy that his wife fully supported him.