Tuesday, May 27, 2025

Apartment 213 (words 546)

 

The police van screeched to a halt in front of the old apartment complex, its red-and-blue lights reflecting in the puddles on the cracked pavement. Two officers, guns drawn, charged up the stairwell to the second floor, stopping outside apartment 213.

They rang the bell. No answer.

“Try it,” one officer said.

The door creaked open with ease.

Inside, the television blared late-night commercials. The room stank of blood and cheap air freshener. A young woman, about 25, lay sprawled on the sofa, her nightgown soaked in red, her lifeless eyes wide open in horror. Deep stab wounds puckered her torso, blood splattered across the walls.

Standing beside her was a large man in his mid-forties. Faded jeans with a sweat-stained T-shirt. His hair was wild, and his hands trembled slightly, coated with drying blood.

One officer approached cautiously, checked the woman’s pulse, then shone a flashlight into her eyes. He didn’t need to speak, but murmured anyway:

“Dead.”

The second officer turned to the man. “Are you the one who called us in?”

The man nodded slowly. “You want to know who killed her?” His voice was cold, detached. “Here. Evidence.”

Before either officer could stop him, he snatched a bloody kitchen knife from the sofa and stabbed the woman’s body again and again, grunting with every plunge.

“Drop the knife! Now!” barked the officer, raising his weapon.

The man paused, then let the knife clatter to the floor. He raised his hands, smirking.

As one officer handcuffed him, the other asked, “Why’d you, do it?”

“Bedroom,” the man said. “Go see for yourself.”

In the dimly lit bedroom, the second officer found another body, this one male, late twenties, clad in pyjama. A silk tie was wrapped tightly around his neck. His skull caved in, possibly from the ornate brass lamp now lying askew on the floor.

“Who’s this?” the officer called out.

“Hell, if I know,” the cuffed man replied from the living room. “First time I’ve laid eyes on him.”

“The woman. Is she your wife?”

“What do you think? My mistress? Of course, she’s my wife,” the man spat.

The officer stared at him. “So… why kill them?”

The man laughed, short and manic. “For fun. What kind of stupid question is that?”

A ringtone pierced the silence. The second officer retrieved a mobile phone from the dead man’s pyjama pocket. The screen showed a missed call to 100, placed just minutes earlier. He exchanged a confused glance with his partner.

They called in security from the building gate.

“That man,” the guard said, nodding at the cuffed intruder, “Never seen him before. The other two? They’ve lived here for years. Married. Quiet. Kept to themselves.”

The officers looked at one another, piecing it together.

Just as one opened his mouth to speak, “Cut!” shouted a voice off-camera. “Pack up for the day.” The director seemed happy with the day’s outcome.

Immediately, the tension broke, bringing much relief. Technicians emerged from the shadows. The ‘dead’ actors sat up, yawning. The blood was wiped off with towels. The killer stretched and took a sip from a whisky bottle.

Though the gory illusion was shattered, the air was still thick for a few moments, with morbid cruelty before loud laughter and banter followed.

27 comments:

  1. I thoroughly enjoyed the story—it initially led me to anticipate the usual motives behind such murders, but the unexpected twists truly elevated it. The idea of a killing “for fun” and the final reveal of it all being a staged drama were both brilliantly executed. It made me reflect on the augmented reality of our own lives, where the mind often projects narratives based on ingrained patterns and past experiences. A gripping and thought-provoking read!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. After reading the entire script, which was narrated in the form of act played, it revealed that it was merely a virtual story of triangle love between a couple of an age difference husband and an extramarital relationship with a same age male partner, which is exactly been portrait in line with the storytelling.

      Based on the story, I don't want to criticize the writer's point of view, but I want to pass a message to viewers that all human beings may have the right to live of own choice within in the frame of laws of social structure.

      There shouldn't be any compulsion either by externally or forcefully for an individual's life, so that individual should be compelling to live against the individual liberty or freedom of life.

      Delete
    2. Thank you for your visit to the blog and for the comment but I think there has been some misunderstanding! This story is not about any judgement on people’s choices or lifestyle.

      This is just a story portrayed as real but actually a scene out of a movie shoot where a real young couple were murdered by a middle aged man with mental issues.

      The filmy end was brought to give a surprise twist.

      Delete
    3. Sir
      I know that the reply of mine to your blog post was not in accordance with the topic of your exhibit. It is obvious that your creation was absolutely amazing.
      You tried to create an exact real ambiance in the scenario that was prominently reflected on each word in the dialog, which was kept carrying the suspension until the next episode. You successfully did the execution as a result of the fishing "cuts" in the ends, and it was announced that how the flim making had been done in one take, which shows the level of flim shooting carried out.

      But my purpose was to share my general opinions on the topic to the viewers so that the increasing rate of these kinds of facts prevailing in society should not carry a negative perspective on the public. I took the opportunity to share my views through your blog, and my intentions weren't to make any social commentary. Anyway, thanks for your kind reciprocal reply and necessary feedback to me.

      Delete
  2. Whew! Nail biting suspense! Anu

    ReplyDelete
  3. You built up the suspense nicely and then bang comes the twist.. delightfully deceitful

    ReplyDelete
  4. particularly loved the first twist! fun read as usual, periappa

    ReplyDelete
  5. Turns out the only real crime was how good the acting was! The "killer" probably needed that whiskey after all those dramatic grunts!!
    Janardhan N

    ReplyDelete
  6. A gripping story of suspense. Just when we think he will spill the beans, the twist arrives.
    Delightfully Deceitful as mentioned above.

    ReplyDelete
  7. All that gripping tale of blood and murder should have ended with some passionate climax and here it fizzled out to studio set!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. For some reason first para itself I guessed movie or serial shooting. Regards - Mahesh

    ReplyDelete
  9. A gripping story with the unexpected twist

    ReplyDelete
  10. WHAT A STORY! - Incredibly written with the usual panache! And that in 546 words! Absolutely masterful. Kudos

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well done! See, you should have been writing mystery/suspense all along ! :-) Arvind

    ReplyDelete
  12. Very engaging story till the end. Enjoyed very much.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I always look out for the 'twist' in the tale and got it soon:) But the way you narrate the story is mind boggling....so natural!...Sandhya

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh no ! We just couldn’t predict the ending - neither in the reel , nor in the story ! Awesome thriller !

    ReplyDelete
  15. The psychopath killer was chilling and eerie, the whole situation felt so real, which made the twist brilliant. Totally didn’t see the film shoot end coming! Very nice!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Nice twist in the end. You are very good at short stories with twists. 👏👏👏

    Chitra

    ReplyDelete
  17. An awesome thrilling story to read in one breath, enjoyed a lot.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Now that's a nice twist!

    Best wishes and warm regards
    Hemantha Kumar Pamarthy

    ReplyDelete
  19. Very good story. Ramakrishnan.

    ReplyDelete
  20. The very clear descriptions that you have given have made the crime scene feel very real ... Enjoyed reading!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Phew.....I didn't figure the draft at all...... :) good read :) -Meka

    ReplyDelete
  22. Oh my goodness! What happened here?

    ReplyDelete